"She urinated on my floor": 4 dating horror stories that will make you want to stay in on Valentine's Day

Bridget Jones was no stranger to bad date stories - or bad hair on dates

The dating game is tough and there are so many questions you have to ask yourself when you take the plunge and meet someone for the first time.
What on earth will you talk about? Will they notice that spot on your forehead? And most importantly, will they be able to smell that garlic on your breath from lunch?
These are all natural concerns, but spare a thought for those people who've had a TRULY terrible first date.
We're talking getting into a fight on the tube, hiding behind wheelie bins and your date urinating on your floor - yes, really.
Read on for 14 truly awful tales that will either make you glad to be single or appreciate your other half.

1. "I almost died - then pretended I had!"

"The first time meeting her she was extremely clingy and was already planning our wedding and how many kids we're having - and I had only known her for an hour.
"Being 18 I wasn't ready for this and she was scaring me a lot, getting very obsessed over me. She was giving looks of disgust to everyone who looked at me who was female.
"Fortunately, after the meal we went to get snacks from a corner shop and I accidentally bought a chocolate bar with nuts in - me having a severe nut allergy.
"I was rushed to hospital where I almost died but the next day I was discharged and went to my mate's, where he called her and said I died. We've had no contact since."
Anonymous, London
 

2. "He shot himself"

"I met a guy in our local supermarket and we got talking.

"We arranged to meet up a few days later but he phoned me the night before and told me he'd shot himself in the leg and was in hospital so couldn't make our date!"

"I visited him in hospital and we did eventually get out on our date but we both agreed that it wouldn't work and I never saw him again."

Ros, Belfast
 

3. "I hid behind the nearest wheelie bin"

"I met a gent off a dating site. We met on the train at the local city, Chester. He drank about eight pints and then took me into a nearby B&B, demanding a room for the night!

"I ran off and hid behind the nearest wheelie bin, ignored about 10 missed calls off him.

"He then had the cheek to text me the next day asking where I had gone and if we could meet for a drink."

Julie, Wrexham
 

3."She relieved herself on my floor"

"I had my first date with a lady - well, if you could call her that. The initial date was a success and we got along just fine.

"We decided to go to my house. When we made it to my bedroom she took out her contact lenses and then realised she needed the toilet.

"I gave her the directions to the bathroom. After a little while she returned saying she could not find it and she was too embarrassed to walk past the people in my house, as my flat mate had guests around.

"She took down her undies and proceeded to relieve herself on my floor. Thankfully it was not a carpeted floor. Needless to say there was no second date."

- Simon, Norway

 

4."He launched himself at my cleavage"

"During the second date the man in question invited me for a me to his house.
"After a semi-pleasant evening I was sitting on the couch and he was sat on the floor and we were watching a film.
"Without encouragement or warning he launched himself at me and thrust his face into my cleavage.

 

Cleavage is not an invitation to lunge. Turns out, bras are good defence mechanisms

"I screamed and jumped up only to leave him in a heap on the floor with blood gushing from his face.
"Turns out the wire had protruded from my bra and got caught under his chin!"
JP, South Yorkshire